"La Dia de Las Tres Banditas"

 

Well sir, it looked like bout any other day at the Bloated Goat. There was the usual folks in there for a Friday afternoon.

There was four fellers playiní match stick poker at one of the tables, and Iggy was sittiní at the bar talkiní to Sadie. Things was plumb normal and peaceful.

All of a sudden the door pops open and in comes 3 of the finest lookiní fillies you would ever want to see and dang sure the best lookiní that had ever been in the Goat. They just stood there for a minute and looked the place over and kinda hesitated.

Well you can bet they wasnít the only ones a lookiní. This here was somethiní plumb out of the ordinary for the Goat. Them boys at the poker table looked like they was paralyzed.

All of a sudden one of them gals sez, "We heard about this place from a friend of ours, his name is Chip, and we had to stop and see if all he sed was true."

Then she walked over to the corner, where Iggy was pickiní up his hat. She sez, "My name is Cassie, and you must be Iggy! Chip has told me so much about you and I want to give you a hug!" Well you coulda knocked ol Iggy over with a feather!

But now Iggy ainít no dammed fool. Ifín a good lookiní woman wants a hug, wall he reckoned as how he could handle that.

Well, sir that gal give him a big ol hug an Iggy stood there and kinda grinned. He looked over at them fellers and they all had their chins ahanginí on the table in disbelief.

But that werenít the end of it. One of them other gals walked up and sed, "Iím Nikki, and I want a hug too!"

Well, Iggy was beginniní to get a little flustered, but he bore up under the burden and give that gal a big ol hug too.

He looked over at Sadie and she just shrugged her shoulders and grinned an evil grin at Iggy and warnít no help at all.

Nikki, stepped back and there was that other gal. She stepped up to Iggy and sed. "Iím Di, donít forget me!"

Wall, ol Iggy was plumb bumfuzzled by now, but he give that gal a hug too. He looked over at them fellers at the table and their chins was plumb down on the floor their mouths was hanginí open so far.

Iggy dinít quite know what to think of all this, but he had a grin on his face as big as the grill on a 57 Buick... and thatís the truth.

Sadie was the first one to come to her senses and she sed, Well if you ladies are friends of Chip's then let me buy you a drink, whatíll you have?"

Them three gals spoke in unison and sed, "Weíll have a shot of Stump Blower!"

Well, I kin tell you, that you could heard a pin drop in there for a minute.

Sadie sed, "Are you sure?"

Them gals looked at each other and grinned and sed... "Yup, thatís what we want."

Sadie poured each of them a shot of Stump Blower and slid them glasses across the bar,and just shook her head.

Well sir, them gals drank that Stump Blower down in one snort and stood there.

Iggy and the others waited for the explosion, but nothing happened.

Them gals kind quivered a couple of times and tears came to Nikkiís eyes, but she never flinched.

After about 30 seconds of silence, Cassie let out a big breath and squeaked. "Wow!! Thatís good stuff!!!"

Well I kin tell you right now, them gals had gained the respect of everbody in the Goat and thatís plumb center.

Sadie sed, "Ladies, I am sure you could use a chaser after that, and I am sure Chip would be proud if I put it on his tab." The gals all sed they would like Margaritas if that was possible.

Sadie went and found her book on makiní drinks and in a shortwhile she had a reasonable facsimile of Margarita built for each of them gals and brought it over to the table where the gals had set. They sat there an drank them Margaritas and laughed and hollered and had a great time.

The gals sed they was from Canada and it turns out that they was sisters.

Well the only Canadians Iggy had ever met was a bunch of the Chuck wagon racers from Alberta and they was crazy boogers and sides that they drank their beer warm.

You sure as hell couldnít trust anybody that drank warm beer!

Them gals won over the hearts of everbody in the place. They even had Sadie singiní and gigglin' like a school girl in no time. It warnít long and they sed they had to go, as they had to catch a plane in Denver. They each give Iggy and Sadie another hug and they was gone.

Well I kin tell you that was a day that will long be remembered at the Goat.

Fabian called it..... "La dia de Las Tres Bandidas!" It donít seem like you can ever go in the Goat now but somebody brings that day up.

4/23/01